Family dynamics

Family Dynamics deals with the inner and outer working family.  Each member should be valued and respected for the role they play.  Each member should also be respected for their views as it relates to their participation.  If we all work together in communication, respect one another and remain positive our families will thrive. Nothing nor no one is perfect.  If this is understood, then let us please move forward.

What is family?  Seems like it is a simple answer however there are various answers that are given when surveyed.  The universal definition for family is basically of the same blood.  However, as time go on and people grow up, we adopt the idea that family is a connection of love, trust, support and respect.

Family dynamics is separated into 4 categories which are; Co Parenting, Blended Families, Step Families and Original Families

Co Parenting - Effective Co Parenting involves effective communication.  Agreeing to disagree happens often and it is fine.  Respect is what is important.  Collaboration must involve compromise.  We have different views and were all raised in unique ways.  Therefore, the way we feel in highly important.  many find it difficult to understand that everyone will not AGREE WITH YOU.  Be aware of the individuals involved and respect them.

Co-parenting requires much communication respect and awareness of other parties involved.  In order to call parents these things are very important to incorporate before proper planning takes place.  When you think of co-parenting you also think of step parents and Blended families.  Sometimes there is an insecurity there because of the issue of blood.  However, I love hearing the saying that family is not always only blood and that is okay.

  • Co-parenting needs to exclaim the idea of the village 
  • We need to take back our communities
  • We must keep the circle of love, values, and life in rotation
  • The children are the focus of this partnership. 

Blended families/ Step Families

Blended Families and stepfamilies are brought together by the potential and union of marriage.  This can certainly be a great thing!  However, in reality, it can also be a not so great thing.  Before the blending process takes place, many things should be considered.  The 2 most important factors are the individuals responsible for joining the two families.

  • Why are you coming together as a family?
  • Do you love and respect one another?
  • Do you share common goals and values?
  • Will you communicate effectively, objectively and timely without choosing sides?

If you decide to join and become one family, this means that there is only one side.  Unfortunately, this is what causes friction in many blended families.  Because previously from other relationships, the families have decided to blend and become one, the idea of family must take precedence.    Whenever breaking away from the normal routine of who and what you’re used to, situations become challenging.

Making a life together is exciting for the two that are intended but may not be a feeling shared by others in the family.  Finding and creating excitement is a great way to begin.  It is like fighting negativity with positivity.  Address issues in a positive manor. Here are some things to consider for cohesiveness;

Respect one another
Children Must Respect Adults
Always Communicate
Be Objective
Show Compassion
Celebrate Family
Remain Connected

If love is present, let love inspire the need for family.   This is what helps to form family bonds and trust.  At the end of the day, if love, trust and honor is present then we all know that we are able to work things out.  We Are FAMILY!!!

Helpful Resources

In many families, new children and adults easily blend together. Yet, other families brought together through marriage can be difficult. Building relationships can be quite challenging and every situation is different. No matter how your new family came to be, there will be challenges.

There is no easy answer or perfect method when blending a family.  All parents face difficulties from time to time; however when you’re a stepparent, it can be harder because you are not the birth parent. Power struggles can easily occur within the family, whether it’s from the children, your partner’s ex, or even your partner.  The good news is that even if things start off a little rocky, relationships will improve with time. Here are some resources that can provide assistance:

Black Family Development


FamilyLife Blended

The Step Family Foundation

National Stepfamily Resource Center

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